Acceptance of Butches in other “worlds”

Hi, for those of you who are reading this by chance, welcome. For those of you that know me, its wonderful that you payed my little blog a visit and I hope you keep returning to see what I add.

I’m involved in a virtual world known as Second Life and it is really amazing. I recommend it to anyone who likes meeting people and exploring what can be done in a virtual environment. Building, scripting, designing, dancing, racing cars, motorcycles and even yachts as well as flying, to name a few. Its free but you can be a premium member too which does have a few benefits.

Anyway, a while back, a friend of mine started an online newspaper and asked me to write an article for it. The following is what I came up with. It shows that “we” of the Butch ‘persuasion’ face difficulties not only in real life but also in a virtual one too.

Hey, my name is **** **** (removed for privacy) and I’m here to tell you a little about myself and a lot about the general acceptance of females of the butch persuasion on the majority of the all female sims in SL. Firstly, something about me. I love to write, poems mostly, but I decided after a bit of persuasion from visits to “lesbian” sims to put some thoughts down.

I came to SL in early to mid March of 2007, so I’ve been here almost a year. Having said that, I work on an all-female sim (Mysteria) as the security manager and DJ. I’ve found some people accepting of who I am. Some however automatically assume that because I am butch, I am male. It makes me laugh that women claiming to be lesbians don’t know what a butch is. Imagine if I had told them I was a Stone Butch!

Just a quick word about Mysteria before I go on. Suny Knopfli has the right idea here. Everyone is treated like family/friends until they give reason not to be. I love working and relaxing there. I’m biased though since I have known Suny for a few years and trust her implicitly. Butch or Femme, lesbian, bisexual or straight, all women are welcome here and that to me is the right attitude. There are some visitors who assume butch equals male but far less than on other sims.

WHOA hold on there a minute. Lets start over and see what has happened in the world of lesbians on SL.

It seems that lesbians only come in one flavor according to the wit and wisdom (insert sarcasm here) of some on SL. All lesbians must be feminine, they must giggle, they must wear pink or at least admit to liking the colour . Not literally of course but then in RL, as well as SL, we are not all the same.

Some of us are tops, some bottoms, some femme and some butch. Some are stone … that is they do not prefer to be touched in a sexual manner, and some are not. Some are dominant, some are submissive. But in the end, they all have one thing in common, their love for other women.

I decided to compile a “Name & Shame” of the sims I have visited, as a female AND a butch lesbian, so that others will know where “WE” are treated equally and with respect. I sincerely hope that this helps others like me to find a place they can call home and also helps others that are less tolerant to see that there are REAL people with REAL feelings behind the avatars on the screen.

Rather than list them all here with the proof I have gathered, feel free to contact me at any time for a copy of the notecard I have compiled. I’m very willing to share it with anyone. I even have some very incriminating logs of conversations with owners of all female sims. One states that reading profiles is beyond the capability of her staff because they get “100 men a week” visiting. Well I know two sims that get more than that and their staff still manage to read profiles.

Recently, several of my “brothers” were told they were not welcome on an all female sim. All well and good I suppose but the thing that amazes me is that they have buff female bodies complete with breasts. I, on the other hand have a modified female shape and show myself in SL as I am in RL. I have no breasts in RL due to surviving breast cancer. So you see, its not all about what shape your body is.

I’d like to say right now that those women (and I use the term VERY loosely) that stop butches coming onto all female sims need to think long and hard. Remember Stonewall, the fights for equality? Well there is NO excuse now that SL has voice capabilities. Get a headset, a microphone and voice verify people. I think most won’t argue with that and if they do, then fair enough. But I know owners of all female sims that don’t have voice themselves, that have staff that don’t have voice … so I wonder just how many of them are male???

What about all those “women” running around with names like Mike, Burt, Master, Colin, Robert, Fred, Calumn and Roger? Oh well … according to these anti-butch sims, they are ok because they “LOOK” girly. Why not insist on voice verification for THEM? But NO, you’d rather dish out aggro to women who didn’t choose to be butch and not femme but are just as proud of who they are as the femmes are.

please don’t get the wrong idea about how I feel about names. This virtual world has voice capabilities and I’m “voice verified” so when someone with a clearly male name accuses me and then makes an excuse about not having voice, it makes me very wary. But should you decide to give SL a try, look me up, I’d love to make your acquaintance.

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